Fourth day home

Gratitude is what a good life contains.

I'm very thankful for all the help I have had.  I don't need much help, and organizing it is taxing.

So on this the fouth day, my neighbor Jules came to help me out.

I made a grocery shopping list for her, she got the mail, and took out the trash.

With her doing those errands - I got the freezer cleaned out of food I could no long eat.

Ordered the new blender that should help making my new restricted diet easier.

What is great --- the trach remains closed.  I'll see what the doc will say at the Monday appointment.

Making only one human in-person appointment helps the energy and then phone calls are less strenuous.

One volunteer item was to post two shows for the public - felt good.

I used the tips I learned from friend Dana to make hot dogs and placed on my mashed califlower - very yummy.

To end the day --- kitchen was cleaned and I washed the kitchen floor, it looked great and I feel better.

Another day to full healing.

Third day home

It is Friday - slow day.  Energy was not completely up to the day before.  That's okay, listen to your body, it is so important especially when healing.

No in person visits set up except for the visiting nurse who came late afternoon.  The visiting Nurse, Diana, lovely young and smart woman.  The bandage stuck to the healing on my wound on my thigh.  With tremendous patience by her, my ouching and assorted noises as we pulled off the bandage and cleaned it up.  We inserted laughter, about her kids, and my slap stick comments.  Thanks Diana.

Now we need to keep the wound open to the air.  Think about it, front of the thigh, mid way up.  Geez, such a challenge to make a fashion statement.  I got stern directions NOT to go to the garden until it heals.  Need to get another roll of plastic wrap !

I did get to visit via phone with my friend and Library director.  I'm a trustee of the library here in town.  Besides updating her on my progress, we got to talk library stuff.

Then it was my cousin Kathy.  We grew up together.  I was often dropped off at her house during the summer and school breaks.  While we are only two months apart in age, we are a whole generation.  Her dad, my uncle Georgie and my grandfather, Papa, were brothers.  My Papa was 2nd oldest of 13 children and her dad was the youngest.  Both Kathy and I only had brother siblings, 4 and 3, respectively.  It was tough for us girls!  I was the maid of honor in her wedding some 40 years ago.  You could call us two peas in a pod - but we never needed to be in the pod to live our wonderful lives and be the best of the best to each other even when the times between visits could to too long.  She reminded me that her grandma on her mother's side had a tumor removed from her face back some fifty years ago.  Back then there was no reconstruction.  I had totally forgotten that until she reminded me.  Her grandma was a great lady - hope I can live up to her standards.  We got each other caught up, my health situation and what's going on with her side of the family.  We laughed and laughed.

Knocks at the door ---  flowers arrived from a client -- they are so lovely.  One of my rules about this sickness, is that I didn't want flowers, just one more thing to take care of.  He's a special client and he and his staff are always great.

Amazon delivery - a smoothie / soup book from Susan M and a pink salt rock lamp & little book on friends are the family we choose from Elena.  These two ladies are just too much.  They have been are ready to jump in to help.  I am so fortunate.

Early this day, I posted on my regular Facebook feed a letter to family & friends that may have not known about this whirlwind of this cancer.  It was so difficult to reach out before.  This technology has allowed me to reach out now.  So many well wishes and prayers and such nice comments.  It will take days to acknowledge all of them.

Thanks again to all that are in my community.

Second day Home

Relief - Dana came over and washed my hair.  It feels so much better.  I have to keep my neck wounds covered so it did not get done in the hospital.  Breakfast was difficult as getting applesauce, It took me five tries to get it and in place for breakfast!  Some items / tasks are amazing effort physically and mentally.  I'm sure it will be getting better.

I'm still a bit fuzzy with my time line from the operation.  Need to think twice to make sure I am picking the right words to say.  It is like the words a circling my head to be able to get them out.  Typing on the other hand seems not to be an issue.  It's all the "sleep medicine" that is still lingeringly around.

Talking - I should say, re-learning to talk.  Since the interior of my mouth changed with removal of my right bone palate and replace with a soft tissue palate, it is challenging.  Then the hole left from the tracheotomy still makes talking difficult.  I have a whispery voice as the air escapes the hole when I forget to push against it.  More than three syllable words sometimes messes me up, along with lots of 's' .  I've gone through this many times when I changed retainers and plates. 

Progress - it seems my upper lip is less swollen, bottom lip, not yet.  Right side of my face continues to reduce in swelling.  Finding sections of my face that have no feeling is still coming to light.  Seems the docs did a great job with attempting not to disrupt to many of my facial nerves.

It was a good day.

First Full Day Home

First full day home - Horray.

Being home means my healing has allowed me to return to the home front. It hit me that my fight against this rare and illusive sarcoma cancer has to begin also.  Sleep not was comfy as in the hospital bed.  That one cradled me with all sorts of pillows and massage options.

Day one was attempting to do things - sometimes the effort of three times to so something so simple like pouring a portion of apple sauce, forgot the dish, spoon, putting jar back in fridge.  I just crack me up.

An almost three hour meeting with the visiting nurse.  Nice guy, I get squeamish doing medical things.  though the dressing on my thigh is not doing well.  I'll call them today to find out how not to have the gauze stick so I continues to heal.

Lots of phone calls and messages on my FB page Patty's Journey from friends, family, neighbors.  There are so many requests to help me out, so fortunate for that.

Your Life Lessons: Don't audit life.

Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

There can be lots of reason to "audit" your past life.  There could be some life lessons that you need to remember or leftover situations you may have not come to grips with?

What ever it is, get it done, and move forward.  Baggage is a terrible waste of energy and it never lets you go forward.

We only have today.  How many times have you heard that said?  Is it falling deaf on your ears?  How much of today to you want to take to relive the past? 

When you wake up tomorrow, what will you say about yesterday.  Did you spend yesterday in the past?  

Today is today - use it wisely, make the most of it for you.

Your Life Lessons - When in doubt, just take the next small step.

Apollo 11 was the spaceflight that landed the first two people on the Moon. Mission commander Neil Armstrong and pilot Buzz Aldrin, both American, landed the lunar module Eagle on July 20, 1969, at 20:17 UTC.  <Wikipedia>

Celebrating 49 years ago today, the US landed and walked on the moon.

I remember where I was - watching on TV at home as this historic event happened.  That night when the moon shined in the sky, I was wondered if they could see me. 

This mission started with small steps.  On May 25, 1961, President John F. Kennedy announced his goal of putting a man on the moon by the end of the decade in a historic speech before a joint session of Congress that set the United States on a course to the moon.  It was that goal, that set thousands of steps into action.

All things in life start with a goal, and then steps to bring the idea to life.  When we feel overwhelmed by a goal, or just the number of items that  need to be done, we need to sit back a moment and start with a small step, any step.  The momentum of a step closer to the task or idea begins to build and the subsequent steps come easier.

Today - do something.  Take a step.  You'll be a bit closer and enjoy your journey in life a bit more.

Extravaganza - 37th Year

Kick off the 37th Extravaganza was last night.  I have been volunteering for NCTV, Newington Community TV to host this show,  making this 
my fifth year.

It is a great event.  It began last night with helicopter rides, the carnival, ice cream sundaes tie dye tee shirts, and a great band!

We have to be thankful as the weather last night was perfect and the citizens came out for the evening's festivities.  We were able to get some video of the folks waiting for their ride on the helicopters, we saw the carnival, listen to the band, missed the ice cream, and watched the kids make their tie dyed tee shirts.

It is so much fun to interview the kids that come to visit.  They get excited that they may be on TV.  The P&R staff are thankful that we cover the event as capture the fun and stories of what makes this event so memorable.

At the end of the event, Sandy and I, got our ride in the helicopter.  The end of the day ride, in my opinion, is the best.  There it was, the sun setting on the horizon and painting the sky.  What a lovely way to end the day.  

Feeling very fortunate...

Goodbye and Hello, the waves

"There is a goodbye in every hello, just as there is an end in every beginning. 

We all know that our inevitable finale is to leave this world, and hopefully we made an impact in this world and will leave it a better place. 

Yet, despite of death being a part of the cycle of life, still, it never fails to tear a hole in our heart whenever we lose someone we love. 

It’s just one of the hardest things humans have to go through — to grieve a departed loved one.".....

read the article here

I found this article to be helpful and hopeful in the same breath.   Beautifully written with so many contributors yet one man, wrote from the heart and from life. 

There isn't much I can add to this article right now.  I think I'll add some comments as time goes on.

Peace to all your hellos and goodbyes.

Love Actually - the ending

One of my favorite movies ....  Love Actually

What would I do without you?

When it come down to it, should we need to be in an airport to show our love for our friends and family?  Try practicing it each day - a kind gesture is all that is needed.

Your Life Lessons - Yield

Yield  - to give way to arguments, demands, or pressure, give up the struggle, lay down one's arms, raise/show the white flag.

In life, we need to yield, occasionally.  From forest vs trees, to battles vs. wars - the decision in life is to decide which is best for you.  Sometimes there are so many choices.  Making no decision is your decision.  That is where we get stuck, where baggage forms, where so much time is used to accomplish nothing.  Or is that really true?  Does the world around you change enough that your inaction allowed you to make a better decision that could have been made?

Today it is lots of questions - today I am yielding in order to let some events happen and then one of my choices will have more information - then it will be easier.

How do you Yield?

Your Life Lessons - show up!

Are you engaged in your life?

What makes you get up and embrace your day?

These simple questions and many more need to be answered if you truly wish to make your day great.

The "I don't feel like it" (said in the whiningest of tones)  is giving in and giving up.  Often times, it is more emotional than physical.  It is true that some days are weighted down with so much 'stuff' that you need to pull back, process it, and let it pass.  

On those days - it is not a free pass in life to do nothing.  Those are the days we need our inner strength, and do the simplest of activities.

One of my friends wrote a great book on procrastination.  Sometimes that is one of my favorite sports!  In it, she writes that whatever is holding you back, do something, no matter how small, no matter how insignificant, do it.  There is something to be said when you complete some task, the cross it off the list, that gets the 'feeling' reversed.  When I encounter one of those days - I make it a game, set a timer for 5 minutes and get something done and repeat.  Before long me and my day are turning around.

Today I am not concentrating on how I feel (that could be a blog post in itself), I'm up, dressed, I'm at work, and I know at the end of the day, it will be another great day.

Show up today!

Your Life Lessons - It will change

Change is always constant.

Our life's journey is exactly that, a bunch of changes.

Some changes are obvious, your hair begins to thin or grey, you are distracted a bit more, or remembering a current event is a bit foggy.

I personally like change.  Living in New England guarantees me change every three months as the seasons change. From the long days of summer, to the crisp autumn leaves, winter is especially great when we have those snowy days and then, spring, the world around me bursts alive.  

Some changes are welcomed and some are downright unfortunate.  Yet, both pass with time.  I remind certain folks about me that everyday you awake, is your day; make the most of it. 

Whatever is bothering you today - understand it will change.  I heard something cute, look at the change today and ask yourself, what will I think of it in five years?  

Get out and enjoy your day!

4th of July - Bless Her!

Happy Birthday America!

Your Life Lessons - Clutter weighs you down in many ways

Second day of July, it's a Monday and it is the start of the 2nd half of the year.  Where did the 1st half go?

There are triggers to jump start me throughout the year.  Some are weather related - springtime is to plant the garden.

Some are event related - we have a birth and wedding this year in the clan.

Then often it is just the accumulation of all of the above that triggers the "oh my" need to pay attention to the stuff in my life.

Today - pulled out a bunch of stuff from my NCTV cubby and that's my task for the next couple of days.  

Clearing out "stuff" on a regular basis lightens the load.  I did one of the upper cabinets in the kitchen (again) and found a few more items that could go to the donate box.  Went through the clothes closet and weeded out some of the pieces that I haven't worn or will not be wearing.  In the office, I went through paper files and found that 90% was outdated and needed to go to the shredder!

I was talking with my mom the other night and she is considering downsizing from the house she and my dad built. Yet she continues to lament that no one wants her stuff.  First time where two generations are downsizing at the same time and no one wants the stuff.  Life evolves, you need to rid yourself of clutter or get stuck in the past.  

Remember, when you are de-cluttering --- reuse, recycle, reduce is the way to go.

Your Life Lessons - Life is too short..... enjoy it.

She received an extra seven years of life because
she was taken care of and that she took care of another.

Your time on this planet is just way to short not to enjoy yourself.

By living each day, enjoying the day, whatever your time here, it will be great.  Not only for you, for those who have benefited from having you in their life's journey.

It is not a selfish statement - it is a way of living.  Being grateful for what you have, an amazing concept that I see around me, yet not necessarily with the generations that come after me. 

Have you learned this lesson?  Really -- take some time away from your electronics, take a walk, let nature be the music you listen to.  Breath deeply, walk slowly, notice what is around you and the miracles that happen each day - even the simplest of miracles.

Enjoy yourself ...

Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda

 A game played by many adults - what a waste of time two times over.  

First they play the game, they woulda done something, coulda done something or shoulda done something - and they didn't.  Second they are using the present time to play the game instead of doing something today.

It astounds me that we would give up precious time on something that could not be changed and doing nothing to make today better.

Today is a new day --- this now moment --- do something - a suggestion - be kind to yourself!

Cute poem - thanks to Shel Silverstein:

All the Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
Layin' in the sun,
Talkin' bout the things
They woulda-coulda-shoulda done...
But those Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
All ran away and hid
From one little did.

-Shel Silverstein

Your Life Lessons

So I embark on writing once again.  This came across my news feed today.  We could all use a read --- more frequently than every so often.

I don't follow usual rules - ok I don't break the law, yet sometimes events evolve and we need to re-look at the rules.  To start.... #12 is what is important to me today.

12. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

This is so apropos for my day today - June 29th, 2018.  You never know what their journey is about, what in their journey has already happened, and will it shape tomorrow.  How will their journey intersect with your own?

Great question - and can change on a dime.  What are your life lessons.........?

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio .

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 42 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short – enjoy it..

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.

9. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

10. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

11. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

12. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

13. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it...

14 Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

15. Get rid of anything that isn't useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.

16. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

17. It's never too late to be happy. But it’s all up to you and no one else.

18. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

19. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

20. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

21. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

22. The most important sex organ is the brain.

23. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

24. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

25. Always choose life.

26. Forgive but don’t forget.

27. What other people think of you is none of your business.

28. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

29. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

30. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does..

31. Believe in miracles.

32. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

33. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

34. Your children get only one childhood.

35. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

36. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

37. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

38. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have not what you need.

39. The best is yet to come...

40. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

41. Yield.

42. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Its estimated 93% won't forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title '7%'.

I'm in the 7%. Friends are the family that we choose

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